tribute ..

hurm..tribute.. to ustad salam and kak shida..

until now.. i felt guilty... to ustad salam and kak shida ..

i felt .. sorry coz i just step out from usrah without explained to them why i did that kind of decison..

last friday azie told me. "azie..jealous ngan nanie..ustad salam x ingat owang yg ade.. tp ingat owang yg xde" waaa.. hurm.. i know it has been a long time since i went for jaulah..or other activities.. hurm but i just felt i cant..

i felt.... i am pretending to be good in front of them.. yes i cant denied i have the knowledge.. but i do not practiced it well, which make me felt unsatisfied with what i have done.. i know that it is my duty as a muslim to practice what i know...but its hard..

once a week (usrah)/ for mantapkan diri sendiri

once a week (usrah)/ for junior

once a month (khatibah) weekend / for reminder/ qiamullail

once every three or two month (jaulah)/ jalan2x

hurm.. how i want to explain... it is like i am pretending when i sit down and hear the speech from ustaz firdaus, ustazah from indonesia, senior...haih.ape aku mengarut nie... haha ...

thats not the main point.. the main point.. i felt sick to see myself talking nicely to people which is tawadu', wara', alim' or whatever suitable terms that suits them as good person... i felt that i want to vomit.. haha

it is not . i dont like them. i do like.. infact i love them. but it is just not me..

i love to talk nonsense things like " hey chilla, coOl, hot, awesome, whatever, shut, huh..shit" but with them i can't..they are a good girls u see ..huhu..

hug hug then said good things about each other.. wah.. i dont like that part the most..

but hey.. i think i like azie's style the most... i dont know.. but i like her.. it is just her.. i can feel that she is not pretending when she talks to me.. she is who she is..

qoute :
" nanie..seminggu kita tak terima pengisian, hati kita akan jadi lebih gelap, bila hati kita gelap, kita susah nak nangis and kita tak sedar kita dah jauh dari Allah and kita dah wat silap"

"hurm.. selemah-lemah ukhwah ialah kita menghormati sahabat kita and sekuat-kuat ukhwah kita sanggup berkorban ape sahaja untuk sahabat kita"

see.. hurm i like the way she talks to me..azie seriusly thanks.. love u so much :)

ok enough about azie..huhu.. hurm usrah do make me realised.. that.. we cannot do this we cannot do that.. islam is agama yg syumul, cantik, setiap perkara membawa kita kejalan yg benar.. tp what i realised people who joined usrah are not like that.. they are a bit different..

i know.. nobody is perfect.. even i am not perfect either.. maybe when i write this post, there are somebody else says bad about me.. huhu.. but what i want to explain is they do not do what they know and what they say, they only say good things during the usrah.. but then.. after that "boom it all gone" it is like they never get "the knowledge" during the usrah.. it is like u attend the usrah because u are force too. not because u felt u wanted too (there is no sincerity in ur heart).. i know sometime we must push ourself.. but hurm. i dont know..

there are also people went for usrah because they wanted to show that "hey, i go to usrah..wah aku baik/riak/baget baek".. suck them! that is freaking...*tut*..and some of them wanted to go to usrah because people that they "like" go to usrah as well so they want to show that they are in usrah as well. haha stupid!

haih.................................. hesitating

it is not that i dont like usrah..... but.... i dont like people in the usrah.. make me.. dont want to joint the usrah

" hey ape kes... dah tau menda tue slah.. wat gak... pakai baju ketat haha..nasib ko lah, attractive tue body shape lawala katakan.. haha "

sometime topic mesti sama.. pasal couple, camne nak jaga hati. haha

hello............... dah tau tp tanya gak lagikan.. belasah kang!!

we need something that can bring umat islam to victory!!!!!!! dont u see that??

i hate people that poyo baek!!..please2x.. can u be urself.. express urself.. but.. limit it.. jangan over express.. u r human.. u should know.....what is good and what is bad..

sorry again ustad salam, kak shida.. hurm but i promise myself i will never ever ever ever stop searching about islam, i love islam so much which make me strong to continue to develop my knowledge about it!. insyAllah..

Tribute to ustad salam and kak shida!..syurga itu manis..untuk pejuang seperti kamu..